Monthly Archives: March 2012

Happy Wednesday!

Posted by Evan on

At school.

About to head to my Basic Musicianship class. I’ve done all the work for that class for the next week. I have something due next Wednesday that I’ll attempt to finish this week. Next week, Friday around 3pm, my Spring Break officially starts. In between now and then, I have two 4 page papers and a test. It’s all good. I’ll get the papers done and study for the test.
School is going well overall. Currently I have, all A’s but I am sooo looking forward to having some time off.

While, school is going brilliantly, my living situation is..what it is. I hope to move in the next couple weeks. I had the good fortune to receive an unexpected educational grant this morning so I can use that to search for a room.

Last monday I received my first ever scholarship. It was a small amount but every bit helps and I was psyched to get it. I bought things that I needed for my (borrowed) alto sax. I bought a good neckstrap, a really interesting ligature, and a book called, A Tune A Day. I had been borrowing a neckstrap and a ligature from a couple of band mates. My teacher said when I got the book, we’d meet up and he’d start teaching me stuff. I have a long road ahead of me. I want to play music well.

Last night in my Intro to Music class, our Professor introduced us to the work of Eldar Djangirov. Eldar is a former student of my teacher. Our Prof. played samples from all of his CDs, starting with the one he recorded at age 14. With every CD, I could hear the technical improvements. As soon as I heard the first few notes of the first song on the grammy nominated album “Re-imagination”, well..the sounds made my heart and energetic field expand. Incredible music. After class I immediately got on Spotify and listened to his self titled album and part of his live album. Sadly, Re-imagination isn’t on Spotify. I have to find it by other means. He’s playing tomorrow night at Anthology here in San Diego with Pat Martino.

He’s been playing since he was 5. I just started piano in Winter of 2011. I don’t compare myself with others..usually. And am not/will not compare myself to the greats or the child prodigies or anything. I just know that a musical life would be a great life for me and I want to be the best that I can be. I have talent butI feel my main talent is my ability to self discipline, my determination and ability to persevere. I won’t be able to practice the sax for a week or so but I can practice piano. I’m set to start learning my major 7th chords next week. Today I’m just going to be fooling around with a couple songs I’m learning. Today, in Basic Musicainship, we are learning relative minor keys and scales. We are going to start with melodic and harmonic today or Monday. Gotta head to class. Gonna be late. Doh.

Happy Wednesday All.

Peace and Love to you.

Self Worth

Posted by Evan on

Right now my entire self worth is wrapped up in school. Like a broken record I’ve been telling myself it’s the one thing I’m good at. I don’t like hw but I like everything else about it. The environment of learning. Class discussions. My professors and fellow students. This emphasis on school and feeling like it’s the only thing I’m good at is reflective of how I am feeling about other aspects of my life. My ability to support myself, my relationship with my parents are taking a toll. My romantic life took a blow this week but I think everything will be okay. For some reason I’m very optimistic. Hopeless romantic maybe. Whatever. It’s nice to feel optimistic :)

My inner guidance is telling me I need to work with children. It’s been insistent in the last week or two. Like really insistent. I volunteer about an hour or an hour and half a week with the kids at the Child Development Center, but I feel my soul calling me to do more. I don’t know what exactly or where.

I’ve been having anxiety dreams lately. Where I’m injured or I haven’t finished things that are due. I feel pain in the dreams and am surprised when I wake up that I’m not really hurt. On a subconscious level I am hurting or hurting myself?

I feel like I need to take some time and re-evaluate my life and life goals. I like my day to day but I’d like to feel more secure in a material sense. There are things going in with my health that are directly money related. I have a strong will and luckily my personality is geared towards optimism and perseverance.

I’m grateful for the resources that San Diego County has for people who have no or low income. I am grateful for school and my peer group, with a special shot out to my guys and one girl in Jazz Band. I am glad for all the work I did today. I am grateful for all the love in my life, for the earth that I walk on and the air that I breathe. I am grateful for water, that quenches my thirst, cleanses and renews me, reminds me to flow and grow. I am grateful for all the lessons that I’ve learned in the last couple weeks. I am grateful for my friends, new and old. I am thankful for all the technology that I use everyday that really makes my life easier and more enjoyable.