Gratitude-October (23)

Gratitude:
-For knowing
-For risk
-For self
-For moderation, balance, harmony in all things
-For long showers
-For experiencing love in new ways. It’s not easy at all. Like I can’t even begin to describe how I’m feeling and what I’m learning. Peaceful in my heart, frustrated mildly in my mind. In need of comfort, I’m lonely tonight so I’ll end now with this: I am thankful for being able to feel to this capacity period. Good things are coming my way. I feel it.

Feel free to share anything you’re grateful for in the comments below 🙂

Ta

Gratitude-October (11) Happy National Coming Out Day!

Gratitude:
-For the privilege and pleasure of being myself.


-National Coming Out Day!
-Tea to calm my stomach
-Past writing. Walking on memory lane. It’s fascinating to see what a few years ago me was thinking about and going through. Some of my dreams for myself are the very same in regards to career and relationship needs. I’ve grown. Lived through some challenging times to be sure.
-For seeing patterns.
-For clarity
-For patient friends
-For moving forward with “Forward”. We’ve booked our tickets up North and will be filming the 2nd week in November.

Feel free to share anything you’re grateful for in the comments below 🙂

Ta

Peaceful Rage

I randomly and thankfully stumbled across The Queer Nation Manifesto  tonight. It was handed out 28 years ago at New York Pride. I was a 12-year-old queer kid living in Compton.
***
I feel so angry right now about so many things. I let myself down today. But that’s only a small part of the anger I’m feeling.  I won’t get into what I did and did not do but I recognize my failings and I forgive myself because I have to in order to move forward. The suppressed anger that I’ve been feeling is bubbling up to the surface. Feeling unsure how to handle it.
Anger isn’t something I’m comfortable with but it’s something I’m familiar with. Reading the words/testimonies reminded me that my anger is valid. I’m owning it now. I’m making it my bitch.
 ***
TransPride is today. I’ll be there. I’ll march on Saturday in the Pride Parade and attend the festival. I’m picking up my free ticket tomorrow courtesy of The Center.
Fortunate. Always. Grateful.
Sometimes I wonder who would I be without the kindness I encounter pretty much daily? I don’t really want to know. This rage is fuel for now and I’m cool with this fire.
Your everloving, peaceful, raging queerdo,
Evan
Transpride fist